Dave Bolland. Man. Legend. Playoff God. Tourterer of hideous Swedish twins. Troll of anyone on skates. Even teammates. But what else do we know about Dave Bolland? That's what we're here to find out. Join us on a journey. A journey that we could never be the same after.
First, let's examine all the things that Bolly disapproves of...
Dave Bolland disapproves of whatever it is Rebecca Black is laughing at. On second thought...he probably just disapproves of Rebecca Black altogether.
Bolland definitely disapproves of your jubilance and excessive celebration. Your stick is clearly not on fire, Ovechkin.
Bolly's disapproval here is two-fold: 1-Rose, you are a well-to-do woman. Jack lives with rats. You should be with the guy that gets on the escape boats before the women and children. 2-Titanic was an awful movie.
Bolland's Thoughts: "What the hell kind of face is that woman? You're derping all over your dress."
Bolland disapproves of bratty kids on airplanes that don't respect the space of others. He will melt your children's eyeballs with his laser vision if you don't control your demon spawn.
But enough of Bolland's disapproving. How does he keep himself busy when he's NOT trolling the NHL?
That's Bolland & Michael Grabner of the Islanders during a photoshoot for their new TV show Clutch 'N Grabs, a buddy comedy that's good enough to lockout your free time. HAR HAR HAR. (inspired by a tweet from @SuicidePass)
Did you know that Dave Bolland is an accomplished hillbilly banjoist?
HEEEEERRRRRRREEEE'S BOLLY! Dave Bolland takes his games of charades VERY seriously. VERY. SERIOUSLY. (stick tap to @imaraindancer for the idea)
Now, getting back to hockey...
Here's Dave Bolland during his off-season training. Clearly focusing on the Canucks here. (stick tap to @KellyTwomey for the idea)
Vendetta: Continued. (stick tap to @RyanMalia for the idea)
As I said above, Bolland is known for his ability to haunt ugly Swedish twins. (image by @collgrimes)
Dave Bolland doesn't just troll, he RAPSINGS about it too. (image by our own @AndrewBHDL)
Here's Davey in his true cave troll form. (stick tap to @hawknut for the idea)
I'm surprised no one has pointed out Bolly's new and awesome goal celly. (image by @TimBernier31)
And finally, prove positive that Bolland drives the Sedins wild.
All Photoshop work, unless noted done by @KellyBHDL. Catch our weekly photoshop posts (usually) every Friday.